Sometimes, I have a million and one things to say
But worried that it will all just end up in a
wrong situation..
wrong time..
wrong people..
wrong thinking..
wrong mindset..
Thus, leaving all this to nothing that is to be said..

Everyone wants to be understood
But if one dont let him/herself a chance to open up
or trust the person he/she open up to
Then what is that comprehension that one wants?

Sorry, just an observation made..

Neways..
this week was another roller coaster..
not to mention riding it with some sort of flu goin on..
but dont worry, aint a H1N1 flu..
started of with my SIP..
had an awsome marketing videoshoot, acting for the RWS advert..
and the loadwork was kinda increasing too though..
Supervisor said that I have to be prepared to stay OT for most of the time..
and I'm like, might as well u consider me like one of your employee rather than just a regular intern in a company..

Movin on..
I'm kinda going for a mini competition with some of the TPDE peeps together with some FB peeps..
Named ourselves the 'Shut Up Boys' (SUB).. lol..
hmm.. guessin it gonna be a great experience with 'em
had the first practise and it was kool..
it is like the second time I danced since concert..
It was great.. and ofcourse, theres the pros and cons that I felt for myself..
Well, told a few peeps about it..
Too personal to post it..

Orientation for the new batch/juniors of TPDE was great..
I think it was good, considering it was short of a duration and also with some last min changes and stuffs..
Had the opportunity to meet the juniors..
and thanks for all the helpers who had helped out for it aite!

KO Nite was awesome too..
Great job for all competitors!

And so, next week is yet another ride..
Just hoping for the best..

All of a sudden, the future is something that I'm not looking forward to..

HELLO HELLO.

nothing much to say now.
due to being busy this past week.
sometimes just thinking that having SIP in-house is so much way better..
but then, being in RWS does not make me regret that much..
at least im beginning to look at the bright side of it..
its just too bad that i can't post anything that im working on in SIP..
due to it being so confidential and that sort of stuffs..
but overall, it has been fun. =]

Anyways, cutting short..
I just miss being in TP alrite..
and also all my frens and the uncles and aunties of the book link, canteen stalls and of course the Cheers dept store... haha
not to forget my lecturers..
and this one of course, having timetables!!
OMG, i miss all that rushing for lessons and having to arrive to classes within the 15 mins grace.. hah!
and also climbing of all that stairs from the first level to he eight coz of that dumb lift which simply cant lift so many ppl and get packed easily..
but most importantly, my frens luh.. so looooonnnng nvr meet them alr..!!!
that includes the TPDE peeps as well..
I missed all that practising and training for dance performances with them..
all that crazy and awesome times..
being to prepare last min for performances as well...
and time has pass by so fast that it has been one month plus
me being workin for RWS..
and also finding time to actually dance..
guess those who are already experienced in this would understand..

And welcome to those new peeps to TPDE aite!
Glad to have them in.
And of course to the existing batch..
Lets make them feel accepted into our community
so that we can enlarge our family happily!
LOL..

thats all for now..
Till then
=]

Firstly, Venos outing on Labour day was kool..
It was like finally a day off from RWS...
We went to the Glass House Fish & Co. to have our mass dinner..
The food was not bad.. although their 'Best Fish N' Chips in the City' tasted almost the same as the usual one, but i think this one is doper.. lol
Anyways, it has been so long since I met all of them.. Kind of making me miss the FOW/C times..
And it was darn pity I missed this year's one.. and I'm guessing that I wont be able to join the next one..
daaaarrrnnn.. but oh well...
ooo.. and we celebrated Kenneth (Fishy Ken) Bday! haha..
I gotta say Fish N' Co got a unique way of celebrating birthdays.. LOL!
And shy ppl are not encouraged to celebrate their birthdays there coz u have to be darn sporting!
Theres also another table who is celebrating birthday just next to us.. and they are from SP..
they were like trying to compete who is the loudest..
and well, I just had one thing to say.. NEVER compete with TP ppl man! haha..
Coz we are so darn enthu about all these things and loud.. such a wrong move for them to compete with us on such stuffs, knowing that we will be wining on these prospects.. =]
So, after that.. we went to get some beancurd at the Famous Beancurd stall and off to The Cathay to slack around..

And anyways, sorry to the Nexo peeps coz I dont know the date for the night cycling.. lol..
Its like, I know there is one.. but i dont know the date..
So, when Rai told me it was the day before our Venos outing I was darn shocked coz I'm kinda lookin forward to it.. but oh wells.. next time pehaps?

Ooo.. there was also TPDE auditions for both modern and hip-hop..
Modern was on the last wednesday.. and hip-hop was yesterday..
Firstly, modern auditions was not bad..
Noticed quite a number of people who can dance modern really well
even the guys, can see that they really enjoyed it..
I mean, who says guys can't dance modern rite?
Real guys are the one who is not afraid to try something new
and something that is out of their comfort zone and his norms,
at the same time,
Keeping aside and not forgetting of his own genre of dance
that he was first introduced to..
Theres nothing new if wad he can do is only one
coz then he's considered a coward,
not willing to step out of his box and venture on what his body can do..
Some might say dancing modern is too feminine..
I say thats just an excuse for not trying hard and not giving the opportunity for himself to try
Even Ryan can do it with such masculine flavour, swagger, feel and gesture..
so what's the problem with it anyways?
Certainly... this topic is subjective, i know..
But im just leaving this for thoughts to grow from them..

Anyways, modern overall was good.. And I kinda missed dancing it..
Its been awhile.. longer than awhile perhaps..

Moving on...
Hiphop Auditions were great too..
Honestly, this is the first time I danced since GEM 4..
like my body has been confined for like months without moving..
So, I'm freakin happy to be able to 'move' again... LOL..
The ppl who came were generally good, and pretty distinctive..
Ask me about it, coz I'm not gonna post it here..
Overall, I'm just happy with it, coz kinda see quite a number of versatile ppl..
ranging from bboy to modern dancers to popper who can do hip-hop with a bit of essence to it..
Definitely, TPDE peeps totally need to step up..

After the auditions.. came down to Scape for KO nite..
And congrats to Nicole, Raazmy, Andy and Joey for making thru the next round!
I'm happy for y'all.. and definitely the whole TPDE is..
To Ah Lee, Jean, Kevin, Martin, Keiths, Audrey and Jonas..
Don't be so sad or anything.. y'all did a god job! seriously..
I think without you guys, the competition will not be so competitive as last time and y'all definitely make it difficult for the judges to deliberate..
Good job everyone aite.. !! =]
Now I feel like I wanna join it as well.. hah!
If not becuz of this SIP.. make me as though I'm like a serious working adult.. so irritating..
Neways, jiayou for the next round aite! =]

OOooo.. and i seriouly, got something to say and this is the last straw for me..
I hate cabbieeesssss!!!!!!!!
ok... lets just make that be the title of why I'm so pissed off yesterday..
He is like so dumb and smart at the same time..
Ok, it started when Suria, Nicole and I took a cab from TP to Scape..
wait, not even Scape.. to town to be exact...
We told the driver that we wanna go to Scape..
We even explained to him like as if we checked it out from the dictionary or sumthing..
We even gave him nearby landmarks for him to easily locate the building, that it would just leave me to think that only the DUMBEST stupidest taxi driver won't know where the hell this Scape thing is..
And it is so totally not our fault for being not street smart coz obviously we don't know all of these expressway road names, so we just told him took the fastest and quickest way coz we're kinda running late..
So, we assume he knows the way.. and Nicole even suggested another way which appears to be faster with no traffic lights, but at a longer distance..
So we're kinda kool with that..
(This is the part whereby we think that he's kinda dumb..
Wait till the next part whereby he's trying to be smart and that he succeeded to do so..)
It is when we think that the taxi ride is pretty long than usual when we used to cab down from TP to town..
To our shock, he went all the way to Bugis area.. even passed by O School to be exact..
And we were like WTH is with this cabbie..?
Then we actually realized he took the longer route out of the shorter route we told him to..
He even passed the ERP 2 TIMES!!
And this is the part where we think he's smart.. not really smart, but sly..
SUCH AN ASSHOLE..
He even missed the Scape luh.. and even wanna say that he thought it was next to the California Gym there.
so we ended up alighting at the back of Orchard Cineleisure, where we have to walk to the Scape building..
like WTF!.. that is totally against the objective of cabbing to Scape..
and guess wad.. we even paid him $26 for that f**king ride which we know we could pay him 10 bucks lesser..
I swear that I feel like cursing him up and down, left to right while in the cab when we know his motive..
Thnk god for his age, if not I'll be cursing those words as if I'm reading to him in a book!
Freaking irritating.. SERIOUSLY..
and wad more, when we reach there.. theres the freaking queue which started since 5.30pm when the door was supposed to open at 7pm..
It just made me wanna burst out to the fact that I'm hungry and tired as well, that I have to be patient with wads happening around me at that point of time..
It just made me loose the appetite..
So, that explains to most of the ppl why I skipped my meals..
Its just a way for me on how I can keep away from releasing my anger..
Its weird.. but it has been usual for me..

Well, wadever to wadever that happened..
As long as everyone's happy and that they got a place to go in and watch the event..
I'm just so grateful for my patience

So Sunday, figured it has to be a day off for me..
Coz I know next week will be another hell that I have to push through..
So, enjoy this whole day while I still can.. =]

Till then-

HELLO HELLO..

in future, i think my posts will be done twice a week or maybe..
All coz of this busy life of mine..
So, just bear with it aite.. but then again, i will just wonder like who will really keep up to the posts in my blog.. hah..

Moving on.. life has been pretty much the same..
Its just that theres more pressure and more stuffs that I have to carry and bear my responsibilities on..
Be it SIP or dance or just simply my life in general...
I'm just afraid that the letter B for my name will never stand for wad it is anymore..
Instead it will be B for 'Busy' or somthing..
Other than that, other words will just be out of the point during this time..

Sadly, now everything that I will have to blog will be of the general of all generals..
Coz basically, I dont wanna leak any info out dumbly..
I mean, not that I have leaked any or something.. It is just to make sure..
Its only when I have to, then the post will be so direct that it will just hit you on the face..
But then again, most of the time I will just say it face to face coz blogging about a certain matter will just explain how childish one is and how unprofessional he/she handles the matter..
I mean, I have to agree on this.. if one is brave enough to let the whole world read wad he/she is facing and that wadever one is so unhappy about someone, then why not step up ur courage and bravery to just handle it how mature people do and just do it face to face rite?
Just dont understand some ppl..
Its like silently, U want ppl to know that you are not afraid to face ur problem, but is afraid to face it in reality..
GOSH, for once.. grow up..
To anyone who is reading this, I'm not saying this or referring it on anything or anyone.. Just have a feeling of writing this.. haha.. just got too engrossed with what I'm writing on..

As much as I dont wanna talk about this,
But this is a have to, I must say..
Actually I'm not really fussy about who I'm joining with in competitions..
I'm just happy to join with anyone, as long as he/she has the same goal and mindset as I am..
To be clear, my goal is to have fun working together and have a great experience together..
And also, for everyone to have an equal benefit with a fairshare of limelight for every member..
coz if u say working as a team, the limelight or attention shud be given as a group instead of focusing to an individual...
And also, i dont want the team to be like having an immature motive of having to show/prove oneself that he/she is better than the other guy/girl that you wanna compete with..
Coz clearly, such thing is so not needed coz its a competition.. And more importantly working as a team and having the same goal is the crucial point here, if one still wanna think about his/her own benefit..

Lets not get too serious...
Neways, God job for everyone who participated the Wheelbarrow Challenge aite!
Props to Nelson and Ryle for that awesome 16s of the race!
And also to the performers, awesome job as well.. great expereince of dancing on the tracks aye? haha..

oooo..
and and..
Now then I realized that TPDE is kinda a big group..
I mean comparing from other CCA group in TP is one thing..
But the other main one is due to the studio space that can fit million ants but only 30 dancers comfortably at a time..
This is so so so clear that TP have to built another studio somewhere..
And obviously a bigger one and not of those of a coffin's size..
Just transform that Gym into one of OUR studio luh...
I mean, those ppl who uses the gym is such show-off..
like their main objective of going to the gym is only to show how great their body is instead of working out like real men..
They dont even sweat as much as we dancers sweat in our studio luh..
Freakin gayshits..
Just wait till we maincomms make a petition and ask ALL of the Arts Group to sign in it as well about requesting one more studio using the gym's space..
The gym can just be placed sumwhere else.. like in the swimming pool..

Till then-

Updates to my blog was kinda lazy for me recently, coz now I have to update 2 blogs at a time alr..
Other than that I am just plain busy, or in fact very busy with the current situation of life that I'm in now..
Well, lets move on to my updates..

First up, 11th April was my birthday!
So, HAPPY BIRTHDAY to me! lol..
well, nuthing big actually, i'll just treat it as a normal day, like wad is so great for my existence in this world rite..
I gotta say thanks to those who celebrated with me.. I mean, mainly those who went for night-cycling at East Coast that is.. haha.. It was kinda kool, like a unique way of celebrating birthday.. lol! and also thanks to those who got the cake and the wishes.. Greatly appreciated aite! =]

Oh, and the night cycling was awesome! I mean, it was the first one that I've ever been to for the entire 18 years of my life.. but now I'm 19 luh that is.. heh..
We went from East Coast, to like Kallang, town area, Esplanade, and most importantly Marina Barrage! I mean, going to MB was my first time too.. And it is soo kool! I mean with all the infrastructures accompanied by the dimmed lights and the night skies, it is such a nice place to just sit around and be with ur frens while reminiscing those times back then.. or simply just fall asleep on..
But for us, we were like taking photos, laughing our asses off on some acts and jokes and also the disturbances and nuisances..
Well, i definitely remember the petrol stations and the bridge as our landmarks.. and also the feeling of rushing through the construction site while making our way to Marina Barrage..
It was all fun with the right companions.. But I was expecting the whole journey to be more tiring though.. lol!
Looking forward for the next one that is.. =]

Anyways, moving on..
Its kinda iritating coz each day you have something to write about, but u cant coz ur tooo tired..
I mean, talk about mentally drained.. coz every day, my creative juices will just have to be squashed out from the brain till every drop due to this product design for my SIP and the only way I can refill it is by sleeping.. and thats another problem coz i dont really sleep that early as I'm kinda used to sleeping at 1-2am everyday.. and another problem will be to wake up at 5.45am the next morning to get ready for SIP the next day.. pretty much an irritating routine for me aye..

There are also new responsibilities, such as the one I'm in for TPDE.. Well, those who are in shud know my position.. It's pretty much a new role for me to take up, and wad great responsibilities it holds I would say..
Every step you make is seen by everyone of the club, and every move will just make ppl judge u even more.. So, in a way, I think I felt a lil restricted with my actions.. But I'm trying to let me to be myself while carrying out the tasks...
Well, it might seem easy as to speak to a whole lot of people interms of a presentation or while teaching a cheer to a bunch of freshies.. But its definitely a different feel, and a different breeze as to talk in front of ur members as a leader.. especially when u know that at times ur not that good..

One more thing, it is just very questionable as to how fake ppl can be..
I mean, at one point, he can be very nice to u and joke with u and all that sorta stuffs.. but on the other hand, he will start to ignore you and treat u like some hi-bye friend as he found someone better or 'kooler'..
So, izzit like a 'wad-the-fuck' kinda situation? or maybe I'm just in a wrong..
But either way, it doesnt seem to care for me anymore..
I mean, I tried.. but figured that it was kinda waste of my precious limited time..
I just dont know whether ur treating someone as a real fren or just simply using them..

Updates!

okay okay...
its been awhile since I last updated..
and that line has been so cliche now and then..
but oh wells..

and first up is....
CONCERT!
It was an awesome experience and great job everyone!
Everyone = dancers, audience, Production peeps (for once)..
And most especially to the dancers, not any ordinary dancers but TPDE dancers!..
I think all of us did an awesome job..
I mean without our awesomeness the concert/musical will fail rite?
And of course all the trainings, bruises, blood, sweat, tears and bonding sessions..
All these will be of something that we treasure the most and also an experience that none other have ever felt the same way as the one that TPDE has it and does it..
And not to forget all the misunderstandings and miscommunications..
This double trouble will always have a toll in any relationship and friendship that we have throughout this journey and of course, this will definitely test oneself on how mature he/she handle stuffs and thus, help him/her grow into a better person with a better prospect in life..
Anyways, thank you everyone for making this a success and also an enjoyable process for each other..
Can see that most improved, be it dance wise or acting wise, but theres no limit to further improvements..
So, good job once again yo! =]
I rmbered my SIP mate was like asking me " so, no celebration after ur dance performance (concert) uh?"
I said "the concert itself is the celebration for us.."
and she was shocked..
guess non-dancers don't know how it feels to achieve such great aspects in dance life..
but 'oh wells' to her.. haha
and I'm so definitely gonna miss all of u guys man..
y'all mean a lot to me and thnk y'all for every single thing in the process..
Whuddup y'all.. =]

Next, congrats to those who made it for the Main Committee positions..
And for me, i dunno whether to be happy or sad or wadever feelings that I can feel..
Guess, I'm gonna put my responsibility and commitment to it..
and obviously, sacrifice my FO for next year..
But wadever it is, an organisation is still an organisation..
I will not let myself fall with such heavy responsibilty assigned..
I wil just have to grow from it, learn and improve on it..
And of course, to make TPDE a strong and bonded dance group with an unbeatable organisation team of main comm..
Point to note, everyone is different and I'm not gonna follow any footsteps but of my own..
Like most said to me, dont care wad other ppl say.. coz the overall thing is about me managing the team..
thnks aite.. not gonna let y'all down..

moving on, is my SIP..
The workload is like..
WOW..
I mean, it requires so much creativity and innovation and not to mention, have to have a mindset of a picky customer..
But note somthing, I am definitely not complaining; I'm just overwhelmed with how boring and stressful working adult life can be and will be.. gosh, talking about being so silent while doing the work and no one to talk to except to urself or to sumone in MSN..
well, I'm not blaming my SIP mate coz we dont have anything in common to talk about, guess we have our own vibe on life.. haha..
But focusing on sumthing that we have to work on for like 8.30am till 6pm(except for lunchbreak) is so not me.. I wud just easily lose focus and go surf other website discreetly.. guess, its just not my luck to have a manager sit right behind me.. darn..
Other than that, I'm just greatful to have such a good and friendly working space.. And the people in my dept are ever so nice and welcoming.. even my supervisor is such a great gal.. In short, I'm just blessed to have them..
Guess I'll just have to get used to it for the next 4 months..
I can do it! haha..

So neways, went market survey with my supervisor, Patricia, another employee of the same dept, Trina, and my SIP mate, Valerie..
We went from Orchard Rd, where we visit Taka and Paragon, then to Tanglin Rd to visit Tanglin Mall, Natuzzi and Friven & Co, and lastly to Bugis to visit Bugis Street and Parco Bugis Junction..
And btw, its my first time going thru the stretch of Tanglin Rd where awesome malls and buidlings such as The Forum, Orchard Hotel and Hard Rock Cafe are located..
and seriously, the furnitures in Natuzzi are so so so awesomely dope and classy! I mean, I don't even know that branded names such as Fendi and Versace have their own line of home furnishings.. and the designs, is just so drop dead gorgeous man.. can u even imagine one cushion costed ard 1000 singapore dollars??!!
well, to think of it, whoever buys it is stupid luh.. LOL.. besides the fact that he/she is effing wealthy.. I mean, who wud just buy a cushion for that kinda price man.. at least have a furni or sumthing.. haha..
So, adding to a list of aims I wanna acheive in the future, is to have at least one furni from Fendi..
LOL! trust me, they are so crazily beautiful..

Till then..

TMR'S CONCERT!

hey peeps..
So yea, as seen from the title..
TMR'S CONCERT!!!!!
so, all the best to everyone who's performing coz i think we'll make the best out of it!
Its gonna be a blast out of the fairytale.. =]

The day is finally here..
Time to strut our stuff and show the audience that we have more than just dance capability..
And also to show that we, TPDE, are versatile yo! we are just full of expressions that will just irritate the ass out of YOU! lol!..
So, no tix for our concert? too bad.. coz u seriously gonna miss it..
haha..

For myself, I sacrificed quite alot for this production..
for instance, my FO.. which I'm gonna miss them for the entire six days..
well, not entirely coz of that.. reason being is that I'm having my SIP at the same time..
and of course, learnt quite a lot from this journey of self discovery thru concert trainings..
saw different sides to ppl.. and been thru kinda quite a number of obstacles..
but through it all, I think our production is gonna be AWESOME..
So, lets do it tmr yo!

Well, gotta go to bed soon..
bye